


twinbrook texts

by ahshhh



Series: middle-earth social media [1]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Lord of the Rings (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Facebook, Gen, Instagram, KIK, M/M, Social Media AU, Twitter, arwen and tauriel are bros, dis is a strong momma, drunk texts, fili and kili insult each other all the time, group chats, thranduil and bard support all the wrong things
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2018-06-11
Packaged: 2018-08-13 11:17:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 38
Words: 6,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7974892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ahshhh/pseuds/ahshhh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a texting/social media au that no one wanted that goes with the twinbrook chronicles and it's sequel, hands of gold.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Thranduil & Legolas | texting.

**Author's Note:**

> literally nobody wanted this but i came up with it at work.  
> this first conversation technically happens after the last bard & thranduil (barduil 003) chapter but it can also be read on it's own.

[ **legolas**  
_thranduil_ ]

_Legolas, why did Bard and I wake up next to each other???_

 

**You two were fucking wasted, so Gimli and I put you two to bed. You two look good next to each other, that sounded really weird. I'm going to shut up.**

 

_...  
I hate you_

 

**so does tauriel lmao**

 

_wtf did you do_

 

**please don't ever say wtf again, please. and i chose to hang out with gimli over her, gimli is leaving soon!!!**

 

_good. after he leaves, you can find yourself a nice young man that's not him_

 

**...next time you're drunk, i'm putting you outside on the lawn. also, that's okay, i'm going to the same uni as him in fall.**

 

_you're choosing a new uni, sorry not sorry_

 

**ADA NO**  
read at 12:45

 

_oh, don't come in my room...bard is naked._

 

**ew wtf. bye.**


	2. Tauriel & Legolas | texting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tauriel is mad at legolas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know game of thrones is over for now but like??? they would watch it ok. :^)

[ **tauriel**  
_legolas_ ] 

**r u still coming to sigrid's to watch game of thrones?**

_oh shit I totally forgot!! i'm going to Gimli's apartment to watch it with him, Faramir, and Faramir's brother! i'm sorry t. next week! :(_

**whatever legolas. i'll see u at home.**

_:(_  
read at 7:30 p.m.


	3. Sigrid, Bard, & Thranduil | group text

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sigrid is done with her dad and thranduil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bard and thran are day drinking! bard encourages sigrid to have sex??? idk man idk.

[ **bard**  
 _sigrid_ ]

 

_da, the boys & tauriel are coming over_

 

**who are the boys?**

 

_kili and fili!!_

_**oh, right. okay, just pick up after yourselves (and use condoms)** _

__DA, NO. WHAT, NO._ _

_**i mean, i'm just saying! idk what you kids do nowadays besides smoke pot, have sex oR DO HARD DRUGS?????.** _

__i can't believe i'm saying this but da, you have more sex than i do!!! and i don't do drugs wtf_ _

_**oh god, that's sad. sigrid, you should have sex, it's wonderufl. i don't always encourage that but when i do, i'm drunk.** _

__...it's 2 in the afternoon!!???!!_ _

_**i'm with thranduil** _

 

_that explains so much_

 

[ groupchat ]

 

Mr Oropherion { WHAT DO YOU MEan bY THAT EXPLAINS SO MUCHH???

 

**Da <3** [ thran, she means that wHEN we're always tOGETHER we're dirnking or having S.E.X ]

 

Mr Oropherion { why did u do it like s.e.x }

 

_omg why am i in this group chat!???!???_

 

**Da <3** [ becAUSE WE LOVE YOU SIG!!!! ]

 

_goodbye da, goodbye thranduil!_

 

Mr Oropherion { bYE SIGRID SEE YOU IN LIKE A FEW HOURS :^) }


	4. Dís & Thorin --> Fíli & Kíli | texting & group chat.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thorin sends a naughty photo the wrong person, twice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry not sorry, do you guys want to see more dís?? also, let's just pretend that kíli's full name is killian and his middle name is henry bc yanno

[ **thorin**  
 _dís_ ]

Thorin sent a photo!

_Thorin, what are you sending me now?_

_OH GOD THORIN, WHY DID YOU SEND ME A PICTURE OF YOUR DICK_

**OH FUCK THAT WAS MEANT FOR BILBO. OH GOD, DIS I'M  
SO SORRY OH MY GOD. **

_THORIN WHY_

**OH GOD, DON'T TELL FÍLI AND KÍLI**

_TOO LATE_

**fuck me**

_That's Bilbo's job!_

_Or do you fuck him? Actually, that's not a question I need answered. ___

__**christ, dís!** _ _

___Check who you're sending photos to next time!_ _ _

___group chat fíli  & kíli to dís & thorin  
fili **thing 1**  
kili thing 2_

__**thing 1** { YOOOO THORIN, YOU SENT MOM A PICTURE OF YOUR DICK? HAHAHA WHAT THE HELL! }_ _

__thing 2 [ why would u so that????11??? ]_ _

__Thorin the Man ( it was meant for bilbo!!! )_ _

__**Mother Dearest <3** | BUT IT WAS SENT TO ME! |_ _

__Thorin the Man ( I THOUGHT BILBO WAS THE FIRST ONE ON MY MESSAGES LIST, NOT YOU!! )_ _

__thing 2 [ this is why we check the contact name before we send pictures of our genitals, kids!! ]_ _

__**thing 1** { kili, stfu. you've sent sigrid a picture of your dick on accident, before! }_ _

__thing 2 [ FÍLI SHUT UP WHY ]_ _

__Thorin the Man ( WHAT )_ _

__**Mother Dearest <3** | KíLLIAN HENRY DURIN!! |_ _

__thing 2 [ IT WAS MEANT FOR TAURIEL! ]_ _

__Thorin the Man ( where did we go wrong?? )_ _

__**thing 1** { thorin, no more sending nudeS OK??? and everything went wrong when we were born }_ _

__ Thorin sent a photo _ _

__**thing 1** { OH GOD WHAT DID I JUST SAY??? }_ _

__Thorin the Man ( OH C'MON!! )_ _

__thing 2 [ oh god, i need a new family ]_ _

__**Mother Dearest** | For fucks sake, I'm done! |_ _


	5. Arwen & Aragorn | texting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> arwen & aragorn can't decide what to have for dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> basically a joke chapter about husbands saying what they want and then their wives disagreeing with them

[ **arwen**  
_aragorn_ ] 

**What do you want for dinner?**

_Chicken?_

**Eh, we had that a few nights ago**

_Pasta?_

**Too filling**

_Pizza?_

**Don't feel like spending that much money**

_left overs??????_

**We have no left overs**

_fuck this, i'm getting fast food._


	6. Thranduil, Bard, Tauriel | group chat.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> legolas is in trouble & thranduil demands that bard goes with tauriel to help legs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you haven't read chapter 22 of twinbrook chronicles, then i highly recommend you do before reading this.

**Tauriel**   
_Thranduil_   
Bard

**Ada, Legolas is in trouble**

_what are you talking about? he's at percy's place_

**I know, but he just texted me! The one who shall not be named, he knows that Legs is there! I'm worried, he asked me to come with Fee & Kee.**

_shit_  
shit  
shit  
tauriel, you're going and you're bringing bard with you! i can't go, i just left for rivendell!   
shit  
i'm gonna try calling him 

**Don't bother, I already tried and he didn't answer!**

_DON'T TELL ME THAT  
i'm adding you and bard to a group chat, ok?_

**Okay**

 

_group chat | thranduil,_ bard with the good hair, **redheaded child**

_thranduil_ { BARD, LEGOLAS IS IN TROUBLE AND YOU NEED TO GO WITH TAURIEL TO PERCY'S PLACE }

bard with the good hair [ percy's place??? as in the place by laketown!? ]

**readheaded child** ( yes )

bard with the good hair [ well what the fuck is he doing there??? ]

_thranduil_ { DON'T FUCKING QUESTION IT AND GO HELP MY CHILD }

**redheaded child** ( Ada, chill. Bard, will you please come with me? I know that Boromir and Aragorn are there, but the one who shall not be named...he basically has a 'gang'.. )

bard with the good hair [ ...  
fuck. i haven't been there in over thirty years, but yeah, i'll go. i'll come pick you up tauriel, ok? ]

**redheaded child** ( Yeah, okay. Fili and Kili are here, too. Legs demanded that I bring them. )

bard with the good hair [ alright. i'll see you soon ]


	7. Faramir & Eowyn (and Eomer!) | twitter.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> faramir and eowyn use awful pickup lines on each other, eomer is disgusted by them

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i decided to do something different than the usual texts (there will be more social media based chapters coming soon), let me know if you like this! :)

**@faramir_gon** hey **@eowyn_equine** are you from tennessee? because you're the only ten i see. ;)  
**@eowyn_equine** why _"hey @eowyn_equine are you from tennessee? because you're the only ten i see. ;)"_  
**@eomer_eadig** **@faramir_gon** that was terrible please stop  
**@eowyn_equine** **@faramir_gon** you shall not pass...without giving me those digits.  
**@faramir_gon** **@eowyn_equine** i erupt like mount doom for you, baby  
**@eomer_eadig** DUDE NO _" **@faramir_gon** @eowyn_equine i erupt like mount doom for you, baby"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha to the middle earth pick up lines. :-)


	8. Everybody | instagram.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Faramir makes a girlfriend appreciation post on instagram, everyone comments about things unrelated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eowyn & faramir (and eomer) are my guinea pigs for this whole social media thing. :')  
> i got this instagram idea from social media fics on another site.

**faramir_gon** _forget national girlfriend day, everyday to me is national girlfriend day. anyway, this is a super cheesy appreciation post for the love of my life **@eowyn_equine**. happy five months, babe. since we began dating, i've been the happiest i've ever been. you've taught me so much and everyday with you is a new adventure. i can't wait to see how many more adventures we go on as time passes. anway, i can't wait to see you tonight._

| 59 likes & 20 comments

_**eomereadig** this is so disgusting, it's cute._

_**eowyn_equine** of all the pictures you have of me, you chose this one? but anyway this is super cute and i love you. see you tonight! xo. _

**faramir_gon** @eowyn_equine  <3 @eomereadig gtfoh, yo. no one invited you. 

**eowyn_equine** @eomereadig really though, leave. also, don't you dare eat all my pizza. i swear to god.

 **arwen_riv** aw. faramir, this is so cute. happy anniversary, you two!

 **eowyn_equine** @arwen_riv ily arwen :-)

 **eomereadig** YOU HAVE PIZZA?

 **eowyn_equine** I SWEAR TO GOD, EOMER. YOU TOUCH MY PIZZA, I WILL KILL YOU.

 **filidurin** i love how this was meant to be a cheesy post about eowyn but ends up with eowyn wanting to kill eomer, but hey @eomereadig, you don't touch a girl's pizza, trust me fam. that's like a death wish, bro.

 **faramir_gon** i put my phone down for five minutes. @filidurin @eomereadig @eowyn_equine @arwen_riv ?????!!!???

 **eomereadig** @filidurin honestly, that's a risk i'm willing to take...except i forgot that @eowyn_equine PUTS FREAKING PINEAPPLE ON HER PIZZA, WHO DOES THAT!?

 **arwen_riv** @eomereadig ok but pineapple on pizza is actually delicious

 **eowyn_equine** @arwen_riv wanna go get pizza?

 **arwen_riv** @eowyn_equine hell yeah! i'll come get you and we can go to misty mountain

 **eowyn_equine** I LOVE THAT PLACE

 **kilidurin** when this was supposed to be a cheesy appreciation post about eowyn and @arwen_riv ends up stealing your girl, fara, you gotta fight for her.

 **faramir_gon** @kilidurin unfortunately horses  & pizza > boyfriend, that's okay though. @gimlidurinfolk @legsgreenleaf @tauriel.png you guys wanna watch all seasons of sherlock and shameless with me?

 **eowyn_equine** rude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know if you like the instagram posts or the twitter ones, i'll be doing a KIK one and possibly a snapchat one, if i can figure out how to do that lmao. we'll see, we'll see. the KIK one will be next. let me know any other social media chapters you would like to see or which characters you want to interact! :)


	9. Kili, Fili & Tauriel | kik.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kili is bugged by tauriel's last name & fili and tauriel have a heart to heart in a private chat, tauriel comes up with a crazy idea that fili actually considers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i never write about fili and sigrid, i want to do more with them. i love them. so after the whole fiasco with leggles ( which the next part shall be posted soon ) - you'll be getting quite a long figrid chapter. :-)

**KILI** [ are we not going to discuss the elephant in the room? ]

 **TAURIEL** [ what are you talking about? ]

 **FILI** [ he's bothered by the fact that you and legolas have different last names ]

 **TAURIEL** [ oh yeah. i have my dad's last name and legs has our mom's. mom hyphenated her name, but for some stupid reason they decided that each child should get one last name ]

 **KILI** [ that's honestly going to bother me idk why ]

 **FILI** [ it's ok kee, one day, she'll be tauriel durin ;) ]

 **TAURIEL** [ i just choked on my drink, jfc. ]

 **KILI** [ bro, you're putting the cart before the horse ]

 

+

 

PRIVATE MESSAGE BETWEEN FILI & TAURIEL

 

 **FILI** [ answer my question honestly. do you want to marry kili one day? or do you see yourself marrying him? ]

 

 **TAURIEL** [ honestly, one day. i really, really like him. and we've been together for almost two years now. obviously, i'm not expecting him to propose now lmao. it's way too early. but hopefully one day. i wouldn't mind being mrs. durin. what about you, i know that you and sigrid just started dating but can you see yourself marrying her one day? ] 

 

 **FILI** [ yes.  
i know sig and i have only been together for a short amount of time, but tau, she makes me happy. i haven't been this happy in so long. i actually smile when i'm around her and she's my light in dark times. i look forward to every day knowing that i get to see her. i don't know what i'd do without her in my life. i was so lost before we started dating and i can't imagine what idiotic thing i would've done. did you know i considered dropping out of school before i started dating sigrid? but yes, i do see myself marrying her one day. ]

 

 **TAURIEL** [ holy fuck, fee. dude, i hope you know that if you ever need to talk about anything, and i mean anything, you can talk to me. have you told her that, though? ]

 

 **FILI** [ no, i don't want to scare her away. ]

 

 **TAURIEL** [ that wouldn't have scared her away, trust me. you should tell her, if you want. she'll tell you the same thing that i did. fili, but hey here's a crazy idea; you should put a ring on it. ]

 

 **FILI** [ wait, what??? ]

 

 **TAURIEL** [ ask sigrid to marry you, you idiot! ] 

 

 **FILI** [ now?? we've only been dating for a few months! ] 

 

 **TAURIEL** [ so? dude, she's crazy about you! just fucking ask her. do it. do it right now. ]

 

 **FILI** [ bard will kill me. maybe in like three years. ]

 

 **TAURIEL** [ ...  
...  
...  
now ]

 

 **FILI** [ okay ]


	10. Faramir | voicemails.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [ takes place after the third fellowship chapter from twinbrook chronicles ]
> 
> Faramir leaves voicemails on Boromir's phone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally cried as I wrote this.

**Hey! You've reached Boromir, leave a message and I'll get back to you!**

[ _beep_ ] 

12:38 PM

_Come home, Boromir...please. I can't do this without you. You're my best friend._

12:44 PM

_Boromir...I'm sorry._

12:50

_I'll never forget you, Bo. I miss you so much._

12:57

_Remember when you and I ran away from home for like three days and we went to Grandma's? I do. Those were the best three days of my life. I was 3 and you were 6, we played in the woods behind her house. We were pretending we were part of the Gondor army...fuck. I miss being a kid._

1:04

_I never thought I would have to bury my older brother at 24...I'm not ready to bury you. I'm not ready to let go. I want to wake up from this nightmare. I want this to be fake. You're not really gone..right?_


	11. Pippin & Sigrid. | text messages

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pippin texts Sigrid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :(

**PIPPIN** [ Sigrid? It's Pippin Took. ]

**SIGRID** [ Oh! Hi. Um, what's up? ] 

**PIPPIN** [ Your dad told me to text you...we've run into some problems up at Laketown, where we are and Legolas and Tauriel are being brought to the hospital. Kili was thrown out a window, Fili tackled the person that threw Kili out a window and so he and the other person fell out the window and I don't know how he or Kili are. Um. Everyone is in pretty rough shape... ]

**SIGRID** [ ...will you please update me when you know more? ]

**PIPPIN** [ Of course ]

**SIGRID** [ If you see Fili, and he's okay, tell him I love him. ]

read at 4:26 AM

**PIPPIN** [ Sigrid...your dad got in a car crash...he's being brought to the hospital right now. He's being brought to Laketown Medical Center, also, Legolas and Tauriel are also being brought there. I don't think Legolas will survive. He was already clinging to life when your dad was bringing him and Tauriel. Fili is fine, he just has a sprained ankle and a concussion. He says he loves you, too. ]

**SIGRID** [ Thank you, Pippin. Are you okay? ]

**PIPPIN** [ I'm alright, thank you...just a little scarred. ]

**SIGRID** [ What happened? Why did my dad even go to Laketown with the Durin boys? Why was Kili being thrown out a window, why is Legolas practically dead? ]

**PIPPIN** [ Legolas' ex boyfriend. He was abusive towards Legolas and has tried killing him in the past. He came back and it was basically a warzone. He strangled Legolas and beat him pretty badly, I'm not exactly sure what he did to Tauriel, though. She's not in the best shape, even more so now after the crash. ]

read at 4:30 AM

**PIPPIN** [ Fili and Kili's uncle will be picking you and your siblings up to go see your father...he needs to get Fili and Kili anyway, and you apparently live close to them. Just a heads up. I gave him your number. ]

read at 5:13 AM


	12. Dis, Kili, and Fili. | group chat.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dis has a talk with Fili & Kili about a recent piece of information that was revealed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I straight up love writing Dis, expect a lot more of her.

**DIS** [ Killian, Filip, we need to talk. ]

**KILI** [ oh shit, fee. she used our full names ]

**FILI** [ it was Kili! ]

**DIS** [ Boys, this is a very serious matter. It in fact does deal with Kili...and Tauriel. ]

**KILI** [ ...what? ]

**DIS** [ Are you and Tauriel sexually active? ]

**FILI** [ lmao kili being sexually active ]

**DIS** [ Filip Kristofer, not now. Killian, answer my question. ]

**KILI** [ ...is she pregnant? ]

**DIS** [ yes ]

**FILI** [ what does kili knocking up tauriel have to do with me? ]

**DIS** [ As thrilled/angry/confused about this as I am, I want to prevent anymore teenage pregnancies. Are you and Sigrid having sex? ]

**FILI** [ no, i promise. i don't want bard to murder me ]

**KILI** [ dude i would rather have bard murder me than thranduil. thranduil will probably skin me alive, and then use the rest of me in a soup or some juice or something. ]

**FILI** [ true, bard would probably just tie cement blocks to my feet and let me drown in a lake. how did the grandfather to be take the news? ]

**DIS** [ Well, he punched Thorin in the face ]

**FILI** [ thranduil is the real mvp ]

**DIS** [ Not going to lie, was pretty happy he did that. ]

**KILI** [ can we send thranduil a fruit basket for doing so? i love thorin but sometimes i want to punch him but then i remember he'll kill me ]

**DIS** [ Yes, we can send him a fruit basket, looking up a company right now. Anyway, Kili, how are you feeling about the baby? ]

**KILI** [ scared, excited, scared, but mostly excited. you think she'll keep it? ]

**FILI** [ dude, tauriel has known she's pregnant for a while now. sigrid was the first person she told. trust me when i say she's keeping it. ] 

**KILI** [ ...god damn it. how far along is she? ]

**DIS** [ 4 months ]

**KILI** [ fuck ]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love that Fili knew Tauriel was pregnant before anyone else. ;)


	13. Aragorn & Faramir | instagram.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> #ripboromir

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i decided to yet another instagram post

**faramir_gon** _when they had told me that you had passed away, i didn't want to believe it but then aragorn had confirmed it and it felt like i had everything ripped away from me. i can't believe you're gone, you were my best friend and my brother. i still don't want to believe that you're gone, but eowyn told me that in order to heal, i must believe it. this was the last photo of us ever taken (three years ago???), and there are so many things that i wish i could thank you for. but since i can't say them in person, i'm going to tell you here. thank you for teaching me how to ride my bike, how to play video games, thank you for teaching me to read, teaching me to write, teaching me to play soccer and how to cut my own hair. thank you for teaching me how to properly take care of a wound, and most importantly, thank you for taking care of me. you may have been only three years older than me, but you were still a better father figure than our own father was. he blames me for your death and i hate him for that. he hates me, boromir. you were his first born and his favorite, and it's obvious. thank you so much, bor. i miss you so fucking much. #ripboromir_

 **tagged** boromirgon

**aragornelessar** _this is from halloween circa 2013, honestly but i was there the day you died, and it was the worst. a lot had happened that day, and when i mean a lot, i mean a whole war. i wish that i was quicker with tackling the one guy, but i wasn't and i regret not being able to save you. i'm so sorry that this happened, boromir. i love you, buddy. rest easy. #ripboromir_

**tagged** boromirgon


	14. Everybody | facebook.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sigrid posts about her engagement to Fili, everybody comments, and kili insults fili's profile picture

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I mean???  
> I don't know how well this is going to work lol.

**SIGRID BOWMAN** Got Engaged to **FILI DURIN**

Arwen Undomiel, Eowyn Ro, Dis Durin, and 40 others like this

**ARWEN UNDOMIEL** WHAT WHEN HOW

**SIGRID BOWMAN** **Arwen** lmao, last night! 

**BARD BOWMAN** and so it begins

**TAURIEL OROPHERION** these are the kinds of things that i like seeing, congrats again you two!  <3

**FILI DURIN** Thanks T, and congrats to you and **Kili** , Sig and I can't wait to meet that little bugger ;)

**BARD BOWMAN** little bugger!? what did i miss?

**KILI DURIN** Tauriel and I are having a baby, that's what happened while you were out. Also, **Fili** , your profile picture makes you look like a creepy old man.

**SIGRID BOWMAN** omg kili. xD

**FILI DURIN** rude.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do you guys like this lay out??? i can't decide if i do or not.


	15. Eowyn | facebook.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eowyn posts an embarrassing photo of Eomer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a little long and i tried to make it funny

**EOWYN RO** rare photo of a fetus **Eomer Eadig**

Tauriel Oropherion, Bard Bowman, Aragorn Elessar, Faramir Gon & 138 others liked this

**EOMER EADIG** WHY WOULD YOU POST THIS!?

**ARAGORN ELESSAR** I'm so disappointed to find out that **Eomer** isn't a real blonde

**EOWYN RO** because you ate my pizza, you moron.  >:o

**FILI DURIN** LMAAAOOOOOOO. but hey **Eomer** , we tried to warn you, you never eat a lady's pizza, bro.

**SIGRID BOWMAN** my dad wants to know if we can print this and hang it above Thranduil's mantle

**BARD BOWMAN** honestly, i'm going to do it with or without permission. thranduil is sleeping and doesn't need to know.

**EOMER EADIG** WHAT NO DON'T DO THAT

**EOWYN RO** omg yes, do it!! i will love you forever, i want to know how long it takes thran to realize that a picture of eomer is above his mantle lmao.

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** I would like to state that Bard has saved the photo, sent it to himself, and is now printing it. My dad won't honestly won't even notice it's up.

**ARAGORN ELESSAR** LEGOLAS

**EOWYN RO** OMG LEGGLES.

**EOMER EADIG** YOU'RE NOT DEAD!!!!!!

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** :)

**BARD BOWMAN** and the photo of eomer is above the mantle!!

**EOMER EADIG** fuck you

**KILI DURIN** that's thranduil's job.

**EOWYN RO** omfg.

**BARD BOWMAN** this took an unexpected turn

**SIGRID BOWMAN** Thranduil woke up, noticed it, looked at it, laughed at it then walked away and mumbled something about it being the christmas card photo

**THRANDUIL OROPHERION** Not even sorry we're using **Eomer** 's fetus photo as our family's christmas card photo. :)

**EOWYN RO** send one to me!! and our uncle! he'll think it's hilarious!

**THRANDUIL OROPHERION** I'll send you like ten.


	16. Everybody | facebook.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eowyn posts a picture of the Oropherion's holiday card

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had this in my head and I had to post it asap.

**EOWYN RO** **Thranduil Oropherion** i just received this gem and my uncle and i have been laughing for about ten minutes lmao thank you. 

Thranduil Oropherion, Bard Bowman, Bain Bowman, Sigrid Bowman, Aragorn Elessar, Faramir Gon & 107 others liked this

**THRANDUIL OROPHERION** No problem! **Bard** and I laughed for a good hour over it, the lady that printed the cards for us was very confused as to why we couldn't stop laughing.

**EOMER EADIG** holy shit, you weren't kidding

**FILI DURIN** lmaooo. **Kili**

**KILI DURIN** LMAO. **Thranduil** send us one!

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** omg ada. this is my first seeing this, this is gold.

**BARD BOWMAN** **Sigrid** is demanding seven

**SIGRID BOWMAN** actually, i'm demanding about thirty

**ARAGORN ELESSAR** Arwen was in the middle of labor when she saw this, she wants one! 

**THRANDUIL OROPHERION** I'll send Legolas over to the hospital with two!

**EOWYN RO** ARWEN WENT INTO LABOR!?

**EOMER EADIG** ^^ !!!!

**ARAGORN ELESSAR** ;)


	17. Faramir & Eowyn | texts.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little chapter that will somewhat go hand in hand with a Twinbrook Chronicles chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much to Faramir's and Denethor's dismay, everyone wanted to wait until Legolas had hopefully woken up to have Boromir's funeral.

**FARAMIR** [ Boromir's funeral is in a few days. I'm still really lost and confused, E. ]

 **EOWYN** [ I think that before anything, you should talk to Legolas. That's weighing on your mind, and after all, his father is paying for the funeral. Speaking of father's, is Denethor going to be there? ]

 **FARAMIR** [ Of course he is, Boromir was his favorite child. He still blames me for Boromir dying even though I wasn't at Laketown. ] 

**EOWYN** [ Please, just talk to Legolas. You need to clear the air with him, Eomer had talked to him and Legolas said that he felt really guilty and like he was the cause of Boromir dying. ]

 **FARAMIR** [ I mean... ]

 **EOWYN** [ Don't you dare go there, Faramir! It was NOT Legolas' fault that Boromir was MURDERED. Boromir died because he was trying to protect his friend(s) - Boromir could've left, but he didn't because he was loyal. Do you think that Arwen would be upset with Legolas if Aragorn was killed? ]

 **FARAMIR** [ How am I supposed to know? I'm not Arwen!  
I don't even know why I'm blaming Legolas, it's not like he was the one that stabbed Boromir. Wow, I really have no reason to be mad at Legolas. ]


	18. Legolas | facebook.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ** IF YOU HAVEN'T READ CHAPTER 31 OF TWINBROOK CHRONICLES, then be prepared to have a spoiler. You don't need to read it, but this is related to that chapter **
> 
> #riphaldir

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :(

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** I miss you so much, Hal.

59 people reacted to this

**FILI DURIN** What happened!?

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** Haldir escaped from the front yard earlier and was hit by a car.

**SIGRID BOWMAN** omg no, not Hal! :(

**THRANDUIL OROPHERION** I'm sorry, Legolas.

**TAURIEL OROPHERION** wait, what. text me, legolas!!!!!

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** Just did, Tauriel.


	19. gundabad | news article.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an article surfaces in the newspaper about gundabad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the last name for eowyn & theoden is made-up and i just used the elvish translation (i hope it's correct, if not let me know) of high elf for glorfindel's last name.

**TRAGEDY STRIKES AGAIN**  
**BY:** Glorfindel Cala'Quessir  
\------------------------- 

Everybody in Twinbrook, Rohan, Gondor, and the Shire know about the tragedy that transpired about two months ago in Laketown. The event that changed the lives of many Twinbrook residents lives, if you haven't figured it out by now, we're talking about the Laketown incident in which what it considered a _turf war_ broke out between Lurtz Uruk and his ex boyfriend, Legolas Greenleaf.

Unfortunately, for those involved at Laketown, another tragedy has struck, one that was far more deadly for those involved. This time, the event took place at Mount Gundabad, and it involves a majority of those involved at Laketown and another party. One of the parties was led by Azog White, another led by Lurtz Uruk, who last we knew was in a high-security prison near Rohan. The final party had no official leader but what we do know is that Thorin Oakenshield and his younger sister, Dís, were involved.

Thorin was gravely wounded and is currently in critical condition at the same hospital that his younger nephew is currently in. Oakenshield's two nephews and sister were involved in a hit and run the day before the showdown at Gundabad took place. Oakenshield's condition is said to be getting worse.

Among those injured are Éowyn Callaway, the niece of Théoden Callaway, and Bain Bowman, the son of Bard Bowman.

The fate of those involved at Laketown and Gundabad have yet to be decided (except for Aragorn Elessar, who was given eight years on the charge of voluntary manslaughter for his involvement in Laketown).

No one was avaliable for comment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted to write something involving gundabad that wasn't an actual chapter of the main story. so this is what i came up with, i thought it came out okay.


	20. gossip site?? | tweets & articles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a newly found gossip site sends out a bunch of tweets and articles revolving around those involved at Laketown and Gundabad, stirring up drama and bringing unwanted attention.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if this is all jumbled but hey man, annoying gossip sites, right?

  
**MEUNDERGROUND** MIDDLE EARTH UNDERGROUND  
Dís Durin was spotted out for the first time in three months since Gundabad, and she's dressed in a black dress that's a little too formal for everyday! Is the youngest Durin attending a funeral perhaps?

**FEEDURIN** FíLIP DURIN  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** yes, my mother is attending a funeral, now fuck off and let her mourn in peace. ✌️ 

**MEUNDERGROUND** MIDDLE EARTH UNDERGROUND  
**@FEEDURIN** feisty! who is the funeral for? ;) **@MEUNDERGROUND** yes, my mother is attending a funeral, now fuck off and let her mourn in peace. ✌️

**FEEDURIN** FíLIP DURIN  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** none of your business ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

\-------------------------------------  
**MIDDLE-EARTH UNDERGROUND** MARCH 05, 2017  
**BY:** memod1  
  
Uh-oh! Looks like Bard Bowman, one of those involved at Laketown and Gundabad (although do they really consider him an active participant at Gundabad considering he was unconscious for 90% of it?) isn't the person that we here at Middle-Earth Underground thought he was! That's right, the Esgaroth native is a recovering drug addict and alcoholic! The 45 year old father of three has a lot to explain to his new beau, Thranduil Oropherion, who has quite a bit of a past himself. Thranduil had a brief stint in a psychiatric ward shortly after the murder of his wife, Iesdis. Continuing on about Bard, Bowman has struggled with a cocaine addiction but before his coke addiction, he was drinking heavily! Talk about parent of the year...which he's not in our books.

\-------------------------------------  


**MEUNDERGROUND** MIDDLE EARTH UNDERGROUND  
New article all about Bard Bowman is up! Learn more about your favorite father ;)

**SIGRIDBOWMAN** SIGRID BOWMAN  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** who the fuck do you think you are? talking about my father's (and thranduil's) past like that, as far as i know he did not give you permission to post that about him.

\-------------------------------------  
**MIDDLE-EARTH UNDERGROUND** MARCH 08, 2017  
**BY:** memod1  
  
You know, I can't help but wonder why Sigrid Bowman and Fíli Durin are getting married so young, especially after dating for a little over 6 months or so. Could it be that the eldest daughter of Bard Bowman is pregnant with Fíli's child? We think that she could be! Why else would they be getting married? It's not certainly because they love each other or is it?

\-------------------------------------  
**SIGRIDBOWMAN** SIGRID BOWMAN  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** are you fucking kidding me?

**FEEDURIN** FíLIP DURIN  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** I can assure you that **@SIGRIDBOWMAN** is NOT pregnant, at least to my knowledge. ✌️

**SIGRIDBOWMAN** SIGRID BOWMAN  
**@FEEDURIN** you're not helping our case, Fee.  


**FEEDURIN** FíLIP DURIN  
**@SIGRIDBOWMAN** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

\-------------------------------------  


**MIDDLE-EARTH UNDERGROUND** MARCH 08, 2017  
**BY:** memod1  
  


Thranduil Oropherion was spotted out with Bard Bowman today, the two were both wrapped up in clothes that hid their faces but both men are quite tall so we were able to recognize them right away (mainly because of Thranduil's long blonde locks). It seemed that they were headed to a very important lunch with Dís Durin, Bilbo Baggins, and a mystery man that we couldn't quite recognize but Mr. Baggins was standing very close to him outside of the little cafe that they met at. Is it Bilbo's new lover, perhaps? ;)

\-------------------------------------  


**BRANDYBUCKMER** MERIADOC BRANDYBUCK  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** bilbo's love life is none of your business, and maybe the adults were just meeting up for lunch. so as everyone else said, fuck off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had no true idea on where this was going honestly


	21. middle earth underground | more articles & tweets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the writer at m.e. underground writes about thorin and continues to be on the badside of fili, they also take another swing at bard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fili is 110% done with them

  
**MIDDLE-EARTH UNDERGROUND** MARCH 10, 2017  
**BY:** memod1  
  


  
Thorin Oakenshield is alive and well, we were quite surprised to see the eldest Durin brother walking around and with a pretty blonde woman on his arm (and she had a giant rock on her ring finger!). We knew that at one point Oakenshield was getting pretty cozy with Bilbo Baggins! What we want to know is when did Thorin get hitched? and what does Bilbo think about this?

\--------------------------------------

**FEEDURIN** FíLIP DURIN  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** do you guys plan on stopping this defamation crap or

**MEUNDERGROUND** MIDDLE EARTH UNDERGROUND  
**@FEEDURIN** no lol ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ **@MEUNDERGROUND** do you guys plan on stopping this defamation crap or

\--------------------------------------

**MIDDLE-EARTH UNDERGROUND** MARCH 10, 2017  
**BY:** memod1  


  
Has Bard's romance with Thranduil already fizzled? Bard was seen walking towards a bar where a handsome man was waiting outside for him, the two embraced each other before entering the bar - we can't help but wonder what Thranduil thinks of all of this. Does the gorgeous blonde even know that his man was seen with another gorgeous fella or does Bard have some more explaining to do?  


\--------------------------------------

**BOWMANBARD** BARD BOWMAN  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** haha that's thranduil's cousin, he's helping us plan a party, thranduil was already inside waiting for us. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	22. everybody | facebook.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :-)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> needed some happy times
> 
> also yes jennifer connelly as dis, i wanted somebody who was in their 40's but didn't look it because that's how i envision my version of dis??
> 
> also this is a mess haha

**SIGRID DURIN** Married **FILI DURIN**

EOWYN CALLAWAY, EOMER EADIG, DIS DURIN, and 80 others like this

**EOWYN CALLAWAY** whoa, whoa, when did this happen!?

**SIGRID DURIN** today :) 

**DIS DURIN** welcome to the family sigrid  <3

**SIGRID DURIN** thanks momma **Dis** <3

**BARD BOWMAN** stop growing up and shh you'll always be a bowman to me. :'(

**SIGRID DURIN** **Bard** what a drama queen :')

**TAURIEL OROPHERION** ugh tell your bean to bake faster so our babies can be best friends

**SIGRID DURIN** **Tauriel** will do, right away.

**EOWYN CALLAWAY** hold up, you got married and you're pregnant!? jesus, what did i miss!? **Arwen** sigrid is growing up!!!

**EOMER EADIG** wait i knew something before Eowyn!?

**ARWEN UNDOMIEL** WHAT, MY LITTLE SIGRID.

**EOWYN CALLAWAY** wait how did he know before me!?

**FILI DURIN** I sent out a giant group text to 75% of the boys telling them, woops.

**ARWEN UNDOMIEL** there better be play dates with our babies in a year, **Tauriel** **Sigrid**

**EOWYN CALLAWAY** wait if i get a puppy, can i be invited!? 

**ARWEN UNDOMIEL** yes!

**SIGRID DURIN** yes!!

**KILI DURIN** Tauriel is in labor but she says yes

**EOWYN CALLAWAY** :D **Faramir** , we're getting a puppy!

**FARAMIR REES** well, alright then.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> obviously a non-canonical last name for faramir because yeah


	23. middle earth underground | more articles.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> middle-earth underground actually has a heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :-)

  
**MIDDLE-EARTH UNDERGROUND** MARCH 12, 2017  
**BY:** memod1  
  
  
Congratulations are in order for Miss Dís Durin (and the rest of the Durin clan!) The 42 year old should be welcoming her first grandchild into the world very shortly. Not only that but Sigrid and Fíli are married! Our sources told us that the two youngsters eloped in Rivendell, and that there's a baby on the way for them! Congratulations to Dís' sons, Fíli and Kíli.

\-------------------------------------

**FEEDURIN** FíLIP DURIN  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** am i seeing this right? an article not slamming someone or stirring up some unneeded drama?

**MEUNDERGROUND** MIDDLE EARTH UNDERGROUND  
**@FEEDURIN** we're not always terrible people haha **@MEUNDERGROUND** am i seeing this right? an article not slamming someone or stirring up some unneeded drama?

**FEEDURIN** FíLIP DURIN  
**@MEUNDERGROUND** hmm. when do we find out who you are?

**MEUNDERGROUND** MIDDLE EARTH UNDERGROUND  
**@FEEDURIN** soon, very soon. **@MEUNDERGROUND** hmm. when do we find out who you are?


	24. bard & thranduil | drunk texts.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bard drunk texts thranduil

[ **BARD** ] you know i rlaly hate you

[ **BARD** ] lke seriouslY

[ **BARD** ] ur the most narcissitics person i hvae evr met

[ **BARD** ] why the hell is ur har so ong

[ **BARD** ] why r u ignorng me

[ **BARD** ] thandul stp ignoring me

[ **BARD** ] seriousy

[ **THRANDUIL** ] This is Glorfindel, Thranduil says to go to sleep and that he'll call you in the morning

[ **BARD** ] waht the fuck whY aer u with thran

[ **THRANDUIL** ] Goodnight, Bard.

[ **BARD** ] wat is he cheatng om ne

[ **BARD** ] plesa tell me

[ **BARD** ] i don't want to loes him

[ **BARD** ] i love him


	25. final middle-earth underground chapter |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the final article posted by alfrid.

  
**MIDDLE-EARTH UNDERGROUND** MARCH 15, 2017  
**BY:** memod1  
  
  
If Bard Bowman was going for father of the year, then he certainly has failed. Mr Bowman has been hospitalized, and guess what for? Alcohol poisoning! A couple of nights ago, I caught the father of three fighting with his beau, Thranduil. The two seemed to drift apart, and it appears that Bard has fallen back into his old ways. I wish Bard a speedy recovery...not. Bard, your old habits were bound to come back to bite you in the ass, it was just a matter of time, my friend.


	26. news update

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> news update

"The mayor and the law enforcement of Twinbrook and surrounding cities is putting a travel ban on all the cities, it's also requested that you stay inside the next day or so if you live in or near Twinbrook, the reasoning will be discussed within the next few hours, until then, please stay inside."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the end is near for our friends :-)


	27. seven years later | facebook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> facebook posts from seven years later

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> op, guess what's coming back and coming soon. a new revamped sequel to twinbrook chronicles. (ugh, i hated the other one, it was really bad.) this sequel will take place five years later, though. (be warned, not everyone gets a happy ending)

**TAURIEL DURIN** aki starts second grade today, where did time go? :(

112 people reacted to this

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** lmao you're so old, tauriel.

**TAURIEL DURIN** if i'm old then what does that make you?

**SIGRID BOWMAN** omg **Legolas** don't even try to come up with a comeback to that

**TAURIEL DURIN** **Sigrid** <3 also i miss you, Sig. We need to have a girls day with **Arwen** , **Eowyn** , and **Lothíriel**

**EOWYN RHEE** :') please! faramir is driving me insane

**LOTHIRIEL CALLAWAY** Yes! Eomer can watch Elfwine for the day, I know he won't mind.

**ARWEN UNDOMIEL** depending on when we decide to do it, i might have to bring the kids!

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** wait i want to be included, i'm basically a wife! and i have a kid.

**TAURIEL DURIN** **Legolas** ugh, fine.

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** gimli and i are offended that our sons first word wasn't dada or dad. tell your husband to stop spending so much time with him, his first word was ki.

**TAURIEL DURIN** **Legolas** then stop dropping your kid off at dad's, we spend 75% of our time there :-)

**KILI DURIN** i feel so special

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the first part of the new story should be up very soon, it won't be long! it'll be a mini series.


	28. barduil fam groupchat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they talk about how to make dis happy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this has minor spoilers for the second chapter of hands of gold (dis ends up moving in with bard and thranduil) - her chapter will take place in december, so two months after fili's death (also a spoiler if you haven't read hands of gold yet).

**GROUP CHAT**  
_bard with the good hair, thrandywill, lego-lass, baino, tildabear, taureal_

**BARD WITH THE GOOD HAIR** alright kids, we need to do something for dis. now that she is living with us and its her first holiday without one of the boys.

**TILDABEAR** I say we ask her what she usually did and we do whatever her traditions were!

**THRANDYWILL** That could work but what if she doesn't want to be reminded of the past?

**TILDABEAR** aw poop, didn't think of that :(

**LEGO-LASS** what if we started a new tradition with her?

**TAUREAL** kee said that since he was allergic to pine needles or whatever, they could never get a real tree and dis always wanted one!

**BARD WITH THE GOOD HAIR** Thran, you down to go cut down a tree?

**THRANDYWILL** orr...you cut the tree down and i sit there looking pretty

**BAINO** men

**LEGO-LASS** lmao

**THRANDYWILL** okay so we're getting a tree, hot coco, and what else?

**TILDABEAR** we could go see the nutcracker??

**BARD WITH THE GOOD HAIR** i second that

**BAINO** sounds good

**TAUREAL** i'm down

**LEGO-LASS** i don't have a babysitter!!!??


	29. reminiscing | facebook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the squad reminisces about when bard proposed to thranduil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not really a spoiler but also??? it's gonna be in the part two of barduil, which will be posted momentarily after this goes up.

**TAURIEL DURIN** anyone else remember when **Bard** proposed to **Thranduil** and **Tilda** came sprinting into the room and did a flip over the arm of the couch and landed on **Legolas**?

341 people reacted to this

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** it was iconic.

**TAURIEL DURIN** i'm still upset no one was recording

**SIGRID BOWMAN** omg can you imagine that? da proposing then tilda comes out of nowhere and does a freaking sommersault onto legolas

**TAURIEL DURIN** #neverforget

**KILI DURIN** it was the greatest thing i ever had the chance to witness

**EOMER EADIG** why does it not surprise me that tilda did that?

**TILDA BOWMAN** HAHAHAHAH, da trying not to laugh while on one knee was the best part of that whole thing

**BARD BOWMAN** it's gone down in history as the best thing to ever happen in our household.


	30. bilbo | facebook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bilbo finally gets a facebook

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess whose back...  
> bilbo's back!  
> obviously :p

**BILBO BAGGINS** This just took me 900 years to make!

33 people reacted to this

**LEGOLAS GREENLEAF** FINALLY.

**TAURIEL DURIN** 900 years indeed!

**SIGRID BOWMAN** Bilbo!

**BARD BOWMAN** bilbo, you're alive! when are you coming to see us?

**BILBO BAGGINS** Soon, actually. I was waiting to hear about Sam and Rosie before I left, but I should be in town very soon!

**THRANDUIL OROPHERION** I'm screaming out of sheer excitement right now.

**BARD BOWMAN** he is, i can confirm

**BILBO BAGGINS** Oh lord 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a bilbo chapter will be next in hands of gold!


	31. barduil group chat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> barduil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, sorry about not doing anything with hands of gold, i’m struggling with it but the new chapter should be up soon but that will be the last update for a little while. i just got news that my biological father passed away and it hit me hard.

> **TO:** BARDUIL  
>  t minus two days until you all come to visit! 

> **TO:** BILBO  
>  **FROM** BARD  
>  Can’t wait, Bilbo! 

> **TO:** BARDUIL  
>  i miss you guys so much! 


	32. cheesy posts | instagram

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> legolas posts a cheesy picture of tauriel and kili

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my first thing with the sim versions of the squad?? i'm going to be working on everyone, updating them as i go along but for now...enjoy? do you like it? i kind of do. i wish i had the editing skills to make it look better!
> 
> i do use mods and custom content for my sims, i can't remember what i used for them off the top of my head. i would have to go in game and see.

  
**legolasgreenleaf** when **@tauriel.jpg** & **keedurin** ask you to take cheesy pictures of them

  
592 likes

**tildabowman** this is actually really cute what the heck

**arwenund** Aw, omg!

**tauriel.jpg** hey that girl is pretty cute

**keedurin** OF ALL THE PHOTOS YOU COULD'VE POSTED

**legolasgreenleaf** **@keedurin** sorry not sorry my dude

**frodobaggins** this pictures makes kili seem really creepy


	33. squad post | instagram

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> another ig post

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi sorry about not updating this or hands of gold in a long time, i've been going through some mental health things and it really kicked my butt. i finally had the energy to whip up this little thing. i accidentally deleted my save with everyone made so i had to remake everyone. but here you go! i hope you like it.

  
**TAURIEL.JPG** when the squad finally gets together

**TAGGED** tildabowman, sigridbow, legolasgreenleaf, imgimli, keedurin

**LEGOLASGREENLEAF** i just noticed this but why are you punching kili?

**KEEDURIN** yeah babe, why are you punching me?

**TILDABOWMAN** HAHAHAHAHA this is gold

**SIGRIDBOW** i love that you can't see me behind **@imgimli**

**IMGIMLI** jesus **@sigridbowman** are you really that short?

**BARDTHEBOWMAN** where was my invite?

**TILDABOWMAN** **@bardthebowman** new phone, who dis?

**THRANDUILORO** this whole picture is dysfunctional

**TAURIEL.JPG** just like our lives **@thranduiloro**

  
**TILDABOWMAN** we don't always take dysfunctional photos when we're together

**TAGGED** tauriel.jpg, sigridbow, legolasgreenleaf, imgimli, keedurin

**TAURIEL.JPG** **@keedurin** r u okay?

**SIGRIDBOW** ah yes, kili showing just how photogenic he is

**KEEDURIN** wait! i was about to sneeze?

**IMGIMLI** wow these photos came out gr8

**LEGOLASGREENLEAF** well, we tried

**BARDTHEBOWMAN** seriously, where was my invite? :(

**TILDABOWMAN** lost in the mail **@bardthebowman**

**SIGRIDBOW** don't worry da, next time iona and i are over, we'll take cute photos! **@bardthebowman**

**TILDABOWMAN** people pleaser **@sigridbow**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the next hands of gold chapter should be up within the next week. if not, then in two weeks.


	34. tauriel | ig post.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tauriel posts a cute pic on instagram

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry about all the instagram posts but a cute little chapter is coming soon, i promise!!

  
**TAURIEL.JPG** I have the cutest baby and dog.  <3

**bardthebowman** okay but my dog is cuter

**tauriel.jpg** @ **bardthebowman** fight me, bard.

**bardthebowman** no because i stand by my statement ;)

**thranoro** you can't even see delilah's face, soo...daeron is cuter ;)

**tauriel.jpg** i actually hate you both so much.


	35. tilda | instagram

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tilda posts an 'embarrassing' photo of bard on instagram

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOU GUYS I'VE BEEN SPELLING THE DOGS NAME WRONG, my b. also i built an entire house just for this story and hands of gold lol

  
**TILDABOWMAN** i walked into the kitchen to get some breakfast and i found **@BARDTHEBOWMAN** half nekked playing with daenor, also i'm not hungry anymore

**BARDTHEBOWMAN** why do you hate me

**LEGOLASGREENLEAF** send this to me **@TILDABOWMAN**

**THRANDUILORO** found my new phone background!

**SIGRIDBOW** are those...eggplants...on his boxers???

**BARDTHEBOWMAN** no **@SIGRIDBOW**

**TILDABOWMAN** yes** **@SIGRIDBOW @BARDTHEBOWMAN**

**SIGRIDBOW** LOL

**KEEDURIN** actual mood


	36. group chat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> legolas, bain, and sigrid discuss what bard plans on doing to get tilda back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter goes hand in hand with the chapter “don’t let me go” from hands of gold. if you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it.

**BAIN** do you guys have any word on what Da wants to do about Tilda?

**SIGRID** he’s letting fili and his group handle that instead of trying to be a hero, but bain, he’s having such a hard time right now. i’m worried he might relapse. 

**BAIN** not good - keep an eye on him! 

**LEGOLAS** Hey do you remember where everyone was last time Tilda was kidnapped? 

**BAIN** gundabad  
oh god..

**SIGRID** not this again...

**LEGOLAS** yeah so...not good.

**SIGRID** WAIT, WAIT.  
fili mentioned something about them being ‘where the beginning of the end started.’

**LEGOLAS** I heard that somewhere, too! 

**SIGRID** but was gundabad the beginning of the end or was it percy’s?

**BAIN** i would say gundabad, i mean it started with percy’s but shit got bad at gundabad. 

**LEGOLAS** Better call the calvary


	37. kili | ig post

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kili posts about tauriel

  
**KEEDURIN** We have more sleepless nights than we do nights where we get sleep.


	38. gimli | instagram

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gimli posts a throwback photo of legolas and mikael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i needed something cheery also i edited everybody to look 1000x better and yeah  
> this takes place before the current events of the story
> 
> i'm considering making an actual instagram for this???

  
**IMGIMLI** my husband and son are pretty cute

  
3,467 likes

**ARWENN** this is such a gorgeous picture of them  
**TAURIEL.JPG** who knew legolas could actually look decent  
**TILDABOWMAN** d'awww look at mikael, my favorite little man, oh and legolas looks pretty snazzy?  
**BARDTHEBOWMAN** wow  
**TILDABOWMAN** i want my father to look at me the way legolas looks at mikael **@BARDTHEBOWMAN**  
**BARDTHEBOWMAN** okay listen, I'm very proud of you darling  
**SIGRIDBOW** **@BARD THE BOWMAN @TILDABOWMAN** he looked at you like that when you were young, and now...he looks at the grandchild that way  
**LEGOLASGREENLEAF** new favorite photo of mik and i! also "grandchild" omg **@SIGRIDBOW**


End file.
